Conversation Summary
Hasan’s interview was inspirational in so many ways. From him turning his “weakness” into his greatest opportunity to the amazing example set by his mum
Feeling left Behind
I met Hasan through a connection from a dear friend I had at Uni. So it was a very serendipitous meeting to say the least, but as soon as I got a glimpse of history I knew I had to interview him and feature him on the podcast.
We talked about a lot of things throughout the conversation but a big theme at the beginning was was pushing that feeling of being left behind in life. Hasan at some point was taken down by a serious illness and was not even able to leave his bed due to extreme pain and lack of mobility. Of course because of this he was not even able to attend school but he was still able to reach his phone where he saw his ex classmates doing yoga, out on boats getting jobs all while he could nothing.
Social media sometimes really pushes that fear of missing out when you see the highlight reels of friends and family. But as bad as he felt, he realized at some point that although he couldn’t do what his friends were doing, he could still learn skills! So he started taking online courses in programmning, turning his days of bed rest to says of “get set”, to be ready when for he would be back to 100%! This level of resiliance didn’t come out of nowhere though, he had an amazing example, through the story of his mum
The Power in Changing your perspective
Perspective to me is the biggest thing that I’ve been learning recently. And I still have a long way to go. Essentially even if you have a choice, if you are not in the mental space to acknowledge you will not see it. If you think you’re doing badly, it’s very hard to see the good, if you see the limits of your situation, it’s hard to see the opportunities within it.
This one is difficult, cause it means getting out of your head to see a situation for what it is and what it can be. Hasan gave another great example of his mum doing this, sending your son to a school that you can’t afford. I’m not sure about you but if I go to the shops and see something outside the budget, I count my losses and walk in the opposite direction. I’m not saying people should start buying stuff they can’t afford but if you change your perspective.
But how many times do we turn down an opportunity because we think ourselves as currently not good enough for it, or don’t speak to someone because we don’t feel like we are at that level? I know I do. But again the story on display didn’t care about those self-imposed limits, but instead saw it from, the potential upside of taking this step as well worth the potential pain of rejection or unaffordability.
Honestly, I think some people’s ability to redefine a moment in time by shifting their perspective is a superpower in itself. And I’m going, to be honest, here we could talk about thinking frameworks, and that works for some people. And gratitude journals, that work for others.
But from what I saw from my mum and what I imagine potentially Hasan saw in his mum, was a lot more emotional.
Like an inner beast, it’s this or nothing, If I don’t move there is someone behind me that will get hit, so I must be more than I am right now and move forward. It’s something that I presume many single parents, especially mums must go through, I think it’s what created the character of the strong black woman. If not me then who, there is no one else, therefore, I must go, I must move forward, therefore, there is a way.
That tenacity, to build a bit every day and continue despite the embarrassment, knowing I’m going to take this free food because I need to feed my kid. People will look at me anyhow but it doesn’t matter, because what I’m fighting for matters much more.
I think it’s that mentality that allows you to switch your perspective and see choices that can lead you out of a situation, not to say that you’ll always make the right choices, but rather you will make choices and make them right.
