Conversation Summary
I interviewed Thando recently and the topic of “defining yourself” came up, and this was her response
“You aren’t what you do, but you have the right to find the work that is fulfilling to you”.
Counselling careers
To set some context, I met Thando back when I was in uni, and she worked in the careers center. She had an interesting journey to get there, so if you are curious about that please check out the interview below. But she is now pivoting to become a therapist, specifically to work on bettering the mental health of immigrants in communities of color. Pretty amazing right?!!
We were talking about some advice that she would give to someone trying to figure out their calling or trying to pivot once realizing they don’t like what they are currently doing.
If you have to take a job that pays you well but it really isn’t your passion, just remember that’s not your whole life. And you can carve out space for your passion, you don’t need to monetize everything you love. But you should also not spiritually would you, if you are spending 40-50 hours a week doing something, I think it should nurture you in some way. So its all about finding that balance.
Our Relationship to Work
We live in an interesting time, purely because the average person in this day and age probably has more options than most that lived even 50 years ago. I mean in history most people didn’t get to choose their job, it was usually generalized that your father was a carpenter so you were a carpenter or you’d just take a job based on the limited opportunities available. But today, we are going through this phase of the great resignation where people are quitting jobs because of a lack of flexibility to work from home. It’s amazing.
An article written by the BBC on work-life says that “increased access to education over the past century has led to the emergence of more varied jobs, and thus more income tiers. So, jobs have become a significant marker of identity in a more nuanced way. When someone says they’re a surgeon, you generally assume they have strong education and high income – two metrics that can determine one’s standing in society, and affect how you subsequently judge the person.”
And I think that is one of the main dilemmas: how you title yourself determines how others see you. If you are a doctor you do pretty well for yourself, whereas if you say you are a plumber it means something else. Though plumbing has eradicated more diseases and saved millions of lives…you’re a plumber. This is why what Thando said was so important
“You are not what you do”
Cause it’s true, there is so much more than the single box of your occupation to who are. With the number of options we all have today, we are so much more than the 9-5, we have hobbies, interests, families, and lives when you die people are not gonna say, he made the best Excel spreadsheets, they are gonna he used to make jokes that only he would laugh at. Not me of course, my jokes are funny…you get the point.
It is important to find work that fulfills you and nurtures you, but remember that is only a part of the larger narrative that makes you.
